This is the time of year when Jews of all stripes contact their relations, friends, acquaintenances, co-workers - generally anyone with whom they were in contact from last Yom Kippor to this.
Actually, the appeal for forgiveness between one person and another starts with Rosh HaShana; the appeal for forgiveness from affronts to HaShem is on Yom Kippor.
Waiting for Rosh HaShana or Yom Kippor makes no sense; an apology - to our fellow or to HaShem - should be offered as soon as the injury is realized.
We learn that we can be absolved of our sins against HaShem on Yom Kippor.
But what it we don't make it to Yom Kippor?
We can make a confession on our death bed, if we are able. But what if we are not able? What if, in our final throes we don't remember injuries (used in the broad sense here) to others and to HaShem? What if the people we have intentionally or unintentionally injured fail to hear our apology because they are not near, or perhaps they are dead.
How many times have we heard people say at a funeral: "I wish I had said I'm sorry for" whatever the offense to the person whose body lies before us?
Observant Jewish men six mornings-a-week ask HaShem to forgive our shortcomings during takhanun תחנון assuming we understand what we are reading
Our sins, our iniquities, our transgressions
But in truth, usually the takhanun are recited as quickly as possible so most of the minyan can get to work on time. (The ba'al tefelah/prayer leader/hazan reads all but a few words aloud in Sefardi congregations.)
That may suffice for HaShem, but probably not for our neighbor who needs to be addressed personally - not in a shot-gun email or snail mail (both of which still are "better than nothing").
And if the offended person refuses to forgive, ask again, and even a third time. This assumes, of course, that the appeal for forgiveness is sincere and that restitution - if needed - has been made.
If we know we offended someone and we "missed" our chance to make amends, can we still appeal after Yom Kippor? Of course. HaShem gave us Pesach Sheni, a second Passover, for people unable to celebrate Passover at the appointed time; surely a sincere apology even after the "heavenly deadline" will have value - at least to the person who was wronged.
Waiting until Rosh HaShana is similar to waiting until a "special occasion" - birthday, wedding anniversary, graduation, whatever - to give a person a gift. If you see something and want to give it to the person, do it then. Who knows that tomorrow will bring.
If you offend someone, apologize as soon as you realize the person was hurt. Make amends; make restitution if necessary.
Don't wait for Rosh HaShana to make amends with your fellow; he or she may not be around when Rosh HaShana comes around.
Don't wait for Yom Kippor to ask HaShem for forgiveness; you may not be around.
Think about it.
Rabbi David Lau addresses the issue far better at http://tinyurl.com/k9fvu5c
I am not a rabbi and I don't play one on tv.
