Every week, the The Institute for Jewish Ideas and Ideals sends out an email querying its members with a “Question of the week.”
QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Recent polls have indicated that 10% of American Jews identify as Orthodox. About 20% identify as Jewish without religion! When 90% of American Jews are not Orthodox, Orthodoxy seems to be becoming more insular and less interested in connecting with other Jews. Should Orthodox Jews engage more creatively and more often with non-Orthodox Jews, or should we build higher walls around ourselves to protect us from negative religious influences?
I have a problem with the question, especially as it comes from Sefardi rabbi Marc Angel.
The problem is the word “Orthodox” and variations of same.
“Orthodox” is, first and foremost, a European concept. It is foreign to Sephardi and Mizrahi Jews. The label is an effective barrier – a מחיצה - where there should be no barrier.
In fact, the question suggests it own answer when it asks: Should Orthodox Jews engage more creatively and more often with non-Orthodox Jews, or should we build higher walls around ourselves to protect us from negative religious influences?
I see far, far too many Jews who reject out of hand any Jew who is “not like me.” Makes no difference if the Jew is (alphabetically) Conservative, Orthodox, or Reform (and flavors in between) or non-observant, whether the Jew is Ashkenazi, Sephardi/Mizrahi, or a blend; ditto for both “accident-of-birth” Jews and converts, “righteous” or otherwise. The “you’re not like me” malady seems less prevalent in Israel – “less” albeit not “non-existent” – than in the U.S.
In general - and remember, “all generalities are lies” - Sephardi/Mizrahi Jews look at other Jews as (a) less observant than, (b) more observant than, or (c) observant like me. The level of observance is dependent on the perception and level of observance of the person making the observation. In other words, how observant I am depends on your level of observance – and, to a lesser extent, your narrow mindedness.
A few quick words on “narrow mindedness.”
The late Hakham R. Ovadia Yosef (נפטר יום ב' חשון תשע''ד) wrote many books and ruled on many things based on his Iraqi heritage and his education. Those who followed him, and there were many, accepted his authority without looking right or left.
I have a book in my library, דברי שלום ואמת, the sole purpose of which is to explain that there are other valid traditions that are equally correct.
Someone in the Shas camp would, for example, tell a woman that she must say the blessing over the Shabat candles before lighting them while the North African – and possibly others – tradition is to light the candles, cover the eyes, then recite the blessing. A minor point, perhaps, but one that caused grief in the family.
There was a time when I was guilty of “looking down” at others who were not like me. The hasid who tucks his trousers into his socks and insists on wearing a fur hap in the hottest weather; the (classical) Reform lady rabbi who absolutely forbids kippa and tallit in her synagogue, and the Jew who drove to shul on Shabat.
I’m older – much older, as it happens – and, thanks to my late father-in-law אליהו בן זהרה לחיאני ע''ה, hopefully much wiser. I learned from him that a Jew is a Jew is a Jew, regardless of the person’s “take” on Judaism.
My father-in-law was not a rabbi. He was not a particularly learned man, at least as far as formal book and yeshiva learning. But he was truly a hakham when it came to people, Jews and non-Jews alike.(He came from Morocco where he daily dealt with Moroccan Jews, Moroccan Muslims, and French Jews and non-Jews.) Lest anyone think Morocco was a place sans hakhamim, there were a number of Moroccan communities with yeshivot of note and it was home to more than a few world renowned rabbinical families; my father-in-law worked with one such family.
I make minyan with a “mixed” congregation. We have Syrians, Egyptians, several Ashkenazim, at least one Turk, and a Moroccan or two. The shul’s sedur is, I think, Ben Ish Hai, but you’ll see other sidurim on the tables (including the Moroccan וזרח השמש and אבותינו). Some were tzit-tzit outside, some not; some have payot, others do not; some are clean shaven all year round, some are bearded from time to time while others’ faces are hirsute all year round. I have never heard anyone even suggest that “that” person is less of a Jew that the speaker.
That’s not to say that every Jew has to be every other Jew’s best friend forever – BFF to the texters – but it is to say that the Jews in my circle are tolerant of Jews with a different perspective on the religion. There is a Chabad center down the street. It starts on Rebbe time – that is, much later than our HaNetz start time. It occasionally lacks one or two to make a minyan, so the rabbi sends a runner to us to “borrow” however many it takes to fill out the minyan.
I am fortunate to live in an area (Hollywood FL) that has an abundance of congregations; many are of the “more observant” category. People float from minyan to minyan. Late for ours? Go to the other Ben Ish Hai shul or the Moroccan synagogue or for a different flavor, try the large Ashkenazi synagogue or the small Ashkenazi storefront shul. Go a little father and there are “non-traditional” congregations.
I’m not a Pollyanna; there are a couple of classes of Jews I heartily dislike; one consists of those who drop their children off at Sunday school – or send them to a Hebrew day or afternoon school – and can’t bother to make minyan; great example, people. The other class is composed of those aliyah managers who ignore recently bar mitzvahed boys (or bat mitzvahed girls in non-traditional congregations). The youngsters soon learn that while everyone tells them their presence is important, it’s not important enough to give them the honors they deserve as children of the commandments, their obligations and benefits. דו פנים doesn’t work for me. (“My” congregation gives honors by The List; everyone eligible for an honor gets an honor in his turn, from the 13-plus a day to the oldest geezer.)
ADVERTISEMENT: Congregation Nahar Shalom (Dania beach/Hollywood FL) needs a cohen. We have several levi’m but no permanent cohen. While every Jew is welcome to Nahar Slalom’s HaNetz minyan, cohanim are especially welcome.
The bottom line for a Jew should be that a Jew is a Jew is a Jew – perhaps less observant, perhaps more observant, or just observant like me.
הריני מקבל עלי מצוה עשה של ואהבת לרעך כמוך, והריני אוהב כל אחד מבני ישראל כנפשי ומאודי
