I sent the following letter to my former synagogue's administrator when I decided it was time to move on.
בע"ה
December 21, 2011/26 כסלו 5772
(Synagogue administrator),
Although we moved to this specific area because of the rabbi and the synagogue, I find that conditions force me to make minyan elsewhere.
There are a number of reasons including
- arrogance of several Board members
- decorum, actually lack of it during services, often by Board members
- disrespect for congregants by some Board members *
- extended bidding for Torah honors; there are ways to reduce the time spent selling the Torah and some of these ways have been suggested to the Board.
- Kol Nidre after dark - not once but at least twice at the synagogue (I don't know about the hotel) **
- lack of aliyah for roughly six months - I had to insist on getting an aliyah; someone should keep records (they do where I go now)
- lack of concern for members - when a person is absent for several days from a minyan the person normally attends it seems appropriate for someone at the congregation (a Board member, the rabbi, hazan, administrator) to try to contact the person to see if the person is in town, ill, or dead
- lack of concern for the congregations' welfare by the Board, including
- the movie issue (no script review, no contract, no monitoring of filming)
- the loss of members issue (Board refuses to poll former members for reasons they went elsewhere)
- lack of respect shown by Board members to the congregation's rabbi
I complained about the decorum on several occasions but was told "this is the Sefardi mentality."
That's nonsense.
It may be a South American mentality; it is NOT the "Sefardi" mentality.
I have been in Sefardi and Mizrachi synagogues in the US and in Israel, and I have NEVER seen such disrespect for the Torah, the rabbi, and fellow congregants. This disrespect seems unique to this congregation.
There are at least two (2) other Sefardi/Mizrachi congregations in the neighborhood. In both cases, people come to pray as a minyan; they don't come to socialize (during prayers). The rabbis are, as they should be, the congregations' CEO; the boss. No one would dare treat the rabbi as some Board members treat the congregation's rabbi.
Again, we moved here specifically for the rabbi and congregation. Fortunately, there now are alternatives to this congregation.
You are free to share this with the rabbi and Board if you wish.
Yohanon Glenn
NOTES:
* When a Board member covers his face with his tallit to avoid shaking hands with a member returning to his seat following an aliyah, it's time to find a new congregation.
סדר התפילות של יום הכיפורים מתחיל באמירת "כל נדרי" וזמנה לפני שקית החמה,מכיון שהיא כעין התרת נדרים ואיןמתירים נדרים השבת ויום-טוב. ספר החג והמועד, עמוד 45
יש להתחיל באמירת "כל נדרי" מספר דקות קודם הלילה, ולכן יש לומר את הפיוטים "לך אלי" ו"שמע קולי" מבעוד יום. ספר ילקוט שמ"ש קעב, עמוד 130
