Thursday, April 8, 2021

Opuscula

Government office
Clerks helpful
But they know all

MY SPOUSE, our Son-in-Law, and this scrivener spent some time in what is officially called the Population & Immigration Authority, a part of Israel’s Interior Ministry.

The last time I had dealings with this organization was c 1975.

Except that now everything is computerized, nothing has changed.

OK., the clerks seem to have gotten younger.

The treatment was strictly Bet Shamai — greeting with a pleasant disposition. Without exception: from the guardians at the entrance to the clerk that handed out numbers, to the clerk that completed our paperwork, Bet Shamai.

 

A clerk named Karen

We had a 9:10 a.m. appointment, but arrived a little early.

Son-in-Law found a parking spot immediately in front of the office. “Nes gadol !"

The appointment was useless; it was first come, first served. The operation was like a well-run drivers’ license office in the U.S.

In short order we were introduced to a young woman who volunteered that her name is Karen.

She guided my Spouse through the typical government ream of paperwork — so much for everything being computerized — and had her sign and sign, and sign again.

Hearing my Hebrew was barely survival level, she had my Spouse, an “almost native” Israeli, provide my information and proofread the documents before asking me to sign and sign again.

She took our pictures for a drivers’ license size document and said it would be in the mail “in about 10 days.”

Catch 22

Ten days isn’t a long time after having been sequestered for 14 days due to the Chinese virus.

Never mind that we had been “Pfizered” (vaccinated) twice and PCR tested once before being allowed to board the oft-canceled El AL flight. Our CDC document was insufficient for Israel. Perhaps if Trump had been re-elected …

We are burdening our daughter and her family — husband, pre-teen daughter, twin 6-year-old boys, and a gentle, albeit large, American Staffordshire Terrier (a/k/a pit bull). We need to find a place of our own — within walking distance for the grand children, of course.

There ARE accommodations for sale in the area, but in order to buy, we have to transfer funds from the States.

That means opening a bank account in Israel.

But in order to open a bank account in Israel, the potential customer needs Israeli identification, a teudat zehut (תעודת זחות), basically a national ID number similar to a U.S. Social Security number but UNLIKE the U.S. Social Security that never was intended as a national ID, the teudat zehut is just that.

I need to memorize it as I did with my Social Security number and my Air Force serial number (that I still can recite some 60 years later).

Temporary & permanent

Son-in-Law, being an Israeli, politely explained to Karen our situation and asked if there was anything that could be done to expedite the process.

Karen suggested he see her supervisor and see if there was something that could be arranged.

He did.

There was.

Within an hour of arriving at the office, we were leaving with temporary (3-month) documents.

To be clear, neither my Son-in-Law nor our Daughter are encouraging us to hasten our departure, but everyone wants to complete the relocation process (from the U.S. to Israel).

The government knows EVERYTHING

One thing that would make most Americans uncomfortable it the amount of information the government has on its citizens.

My spouse was asked about a sister: when she married, husband’s name, children’s names.

I was asked simple questions: my Father-in-Law,s name, when I came to Israel the first time, when my Spouse and I married. (I got two out of three right.)

Karen knew we had two sons, one a dual national, the other U.S. only (his choice).

No sexism (sweetie)

If I were to call a Sweet Young Thing “sweetie” in the U.S. I might find myself accused of any number of improprieties and things illegal.

Apparently that is not the case in Israel, at least for Israeli women of all ages. (I would NOT call a female from America “sweetie” on a bet. I see the “Americanization” of Israel and I don’t like it.)

I still don’t like Israeli politics; too many parties, too much internecine warfare, lack of term limits, and no requirement for Members of Knesset to live among the people they claim to govern. (There ARE exceptions, of course.) I have found no better system than that of the U.S., but as with all things, it can be manipulated to discount the voters’ preferences.

While non-observant Jews from the U.S. are pushing Israel to the left, the Chinese are buying Israel little-by-little. THAT is scary. China already owns much of the U.S. and, apparently, a number of its leading political figures as well.

But here we are and here will will stay, as they say “God willing and the creek don’t rise.”

Expensive

Honesty demands that I admit many things are expensive here.

Housing is, for an American, outrageous. A single-family 3/2 in a desirable gated neighborhood in Florida won’t buy a 3/2 condo in Israel. Worse, the condo rooms are too small for “American-size” furniture.

Anything imported — and many things ARE imported — are dear.

Still, there are trade offs as with everything every where.

Retiring to Mexico or Central America may be less expensive, but there are concerns there, too. (I know at least one U.S. family that “went South of the Border” and returned.)

I doubt I’ll ever own a car in Israel, but I’m 78 and there is good public transportation. Insurance is expensive, but even in the States it isn’t “cheap.”

Nothing is perfect except you and me, and I’m not sure about you. 😉


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